Imagine being confined to your home for the rest of your life. Food and other day to day necessities would get dropped in from the roof every morning and evening. As for cleaning, that will be done on a monthly basis, and you’d get put into a small cage during this process.

I’m fish sitting for someone, and this is what I imagine life is like for my friend, Fishy. I talk to Fishy for a few minutes every morning, to make her day a little brighter. I have this funny feeling that she understands me.

As I approach her tank, which is about the size of a basketball, she sway’s her slender body and slithers her way through the water to greet me at the glass. Now that Fishy and I have gotten closer, talking to her feels like I’m talking to any other pet, like a cat or dog. I see her react to my hand gestures by moving her body or puckering her lips against the tank. She gives me the cutest expressions.

Today I came home and gave her a quick summary of my day. She didn’t have much to say, as usual. I think to myself how sad it must be for Fishy to not be able to go out and explore the world, and meet other fishes. I know she’s a house pet, but sometimes us human’s have made her dependent on us.

So my thought behind writing this post is that I feel it’s important for Fishy, and rest of the animals of the world to live a long and fulfilling life. I’m doing this by simply never buying a fish, knowing I could never provide the fish with an adequate home. Although, I do love dogs, and I’d do my part by only getting a dog when I have a good living environment, can give it plenty of attention, and provide it with the best care possible.

So, no, I don’t have an all encompassing solution for the concerns I brought up today, but I do know each of us can think once, twice, and many more times before getting a pet to ensure we can offer the animal the best possible life.

Happy Petting

%% POSTLINK%% is a post from: tHeMiNdBlOggEr

1. "Be your own prince or Princess for one day” – Pamper yourself, buy yourself a gift, treat yourself to a nice dinner, and dress your best for the day

2. Look yourself in the mirror and congratulate yourself for who you are, and how far you’ve come in life. You deserve it.

3. Create a Vision Board and talk to it at least three times a week (What is a Vision Board?)

4. Be Action Oriented. Procrastination is a sickness and you don’t want to be sick.

5. Do workout. At times, the pre-workout laziness can’t be avoided but the post-workout feeling can’t be imagined without experiencing it. Everyone wants to love their self in the mirror, and a good workout increases that love.

6. Buy sexy underwear (men and women). Feel good about your undies.

7. Get your pictures taken. You don’t have to turn this into an expensive affair. Just ask a friend to take photos of you as you strike a pose. Everyone loves to see pictures (from every possible angle) of themselves.

8. Go for a romantic movie with a date (if you don’t have a date then find one).

9. Find a new recipe (Where to find recipes?) and cook something nice for yourself. Properly prep for the cooking, and invite a friend over to join you for the meal and take pictures of the food once it is ready.

10. Wear something sexy, outside of your comfort zone. Feel confident!

11. Laugh a lot. Whether it be a funny movie, stand up comedian on youtube, or reminiscing about old days with friends. Laughter is the best remedy. If you are in a situation where you have to deal with a person whom you fear talking, just imagine the person in his undies and the you will overcome the fear

12. Look in the mirror and smile. Happy or sad, just smile. It’ll make you feel a whole lot better.

13. Live Kramer’s (from Seinfeld) life for a day … sex, food, golf (or any game you like), and telling it like it is! I am not suggesting anything here, all I am saying is to be yourself, at least for one day (if can’t be all the time)

14. Create a to do list. Keep it simple, and just plan and set goals for the day … just a DAY. In fact if possible, create a procrastination list as well. You will hate to see things you procrastinate on and so you will be motivated to minimize that list everyday till it ceases.

15.  Take short challenges to keep you pumped about life. Instead of saying I want do to this in a year, divide the task into smaller tasks. I want to _______ this week.

16. Practice saying NO. My gym coach said this to me when I said yes to an exercise which I didn’t have the zeal to do but did it anyway and injured myself. Its always better to say NO when you don’t want to say YES. Since then his words are stuck with me and have helped me in different ventures.

17. I got a mug for myself with a picture of me in an air force outfit because I wanted to be one when I was a kid. You can get something similar for yourself. This acts as a great reminder of your passion.

18. Take yourself out for a nice meal at least once a month. Feed yourself fancy once in a while

19. Write down your accomplishments and feel good about them. You should start appreciating what you are doing for yourself. Self appreciation is the best gift.

20. Don’t talk about your goals, but do tell your family and close friends about your accomplishments. (Why you shouldn’t announce your goals to the world)

21. Bear Hugs are really important – give one and get one.

22. People like surprises – surprise someone with a nice card, a phone call, or even a inexpensive gift.

23. Apologies to those you have hurt, and forgive someone who has hurt you.

24. Love is every man for himself – so love yourself (More on this in a separate post)

25. Do maintain your journal. I have been maintaining mine for almost 7 years now, and it’s a great outlet for feelings (anger, frustration, happiness, etc) that were not expressed during the day. You’ll go to sleep feeling much lighter.

26. Stop criticizing yourself. Stop hurting yourself. Just let it go.

27. Don’t go to the waiting zone. There’s no reason to stop living life and to wait for something to happen. Every day we are blessed with new opportunities and a chance to live life to the fullest.

28. Be decisive. Your decisions won’t always be right, but trust yourself and whatever you do, do it whole heartedly.

29. If you cannot say something nice, better to say not say anything at all.

30. Just shut up and listen. For a day, don’t talk about yourself and just listen and really feel what others are saying to you.

31. Sing in the shower, car, or anywhere you feel you can appreciate the singer in you. I sing punjabi/hip-hop songs and think of myself as the Kanye West or Sukshinder of Punjab. Every person on this earth likes singing, and the thought in their mind that he or she could be good singer. So let it out

32. Do find your escape (could be your car, bathroom, or just silence). Take time to escape from life and spend time with yourself.

33. Mindfulness or Meditation. Learn and practice both.

Please contribute your own learning’s, experiences, and comments to the human society

Happy New Year

%% POSTLINK%% is a post from: tHeMiNdBlOggEr

I have a few different theories on why relationships don’t work out. I can’t say I’m an expert in the field, considering I was a late bloomer in the dating field. Nonetheless, I’m good at observing people, and how they interact, and through that, along with what little experience I have, I’ve come up with some interesting conclusions. So read through them, and let me know what your thoughts are.

Pigeon Holing

So your significant other was a great looking, boisterous, bubbly character when you first met. Now they behave like something out of where the wild things are. You can’t expect a person to remain like they first were when you met. Realize that as life brings new experiences, the person you’re with will adjust. Anyhow, who you were yesterday, isn’t the same as who you are today right? You’re core values are probably the same, but an interaction with someone, a new purchase, or a successful work day will add to that great personality of yours. The perfect solution to this is: One, to never say, “But…but…you’ve changed”. Instead, talk to the person. Find out how their goals, likes, dislikes have evolved since your first meeting. Find out what you can do to support this blossoming significant other of yours. And more importantly, grow with that person. Let go of who they were, and learn to love them for who they are.

Post Relationship Depression

I’ve come to the conclusion that most couples lie about how great and exciting their relationship is. I wish someone would just come out and say that shit gets boring after a while. Sure, there’s the honeymoon period, when the sparks are flying, the cash register is dinging, and everyday’s a party. But that quickly fades as you realize your spending habits differ, a mortgage is due, and you have two sets of parents to deal with. Oh geez, doesn’t sound like fun? Well, at times it might not be. But you’re not alone. Most couples deal with the same issues, they just don’t talk about it. It happens. Realize that every night won’t be a date night, there will be some days when your significant other looks better than on other days. Some day’s they’ll have the intellect of Einstein, and other day’s the brain power of Gumbee.  There will be days when you feel proud standing next to them, and days when you wish you could step away from them. No matter what you feel, remember, who they are deep down inside is the same. A relationship will have good days and bad days, just like friendships, a day at the office, or even a night out on the town. For some reason, we’re much harder on those that we’re close to, and to those who we know will be around us for a lifetime. I’m sure you already know how to react to the good days. As for the not so glamorous days, think about what caused the day to go sour. Boredom? Frustration? What could you have done to handle the situation better? The mere act of thinking about what caused things to go wrong will help you grow, and react in a more satisfying manner down the road. Also, remember that your world is how you see it. You can perceive your relationship to be boring, or as great. It’s up to you to create the right environment for success.

“Let’s Take a break?”

This is one idea that’s never sat well with me. My thoughts are , if you can’t solve the problem while you’re together, I highly doubt a resolution will come when you’re apart. And the thing about this is, while you’re in a relationship you can walk away from each other, take a few days off, and go home at the end of the night. But this isn’t possible when you’re married. I suggest learning to handle difficult problems while there is room to think about things. Communicate! Communicate!Communicate! (6 effective ways to communicate in a relationship) And if all you guys out there think it’s difficult to communicate before marriage, it’ll only get more difficult post marriage. So with patience, lots of listening, less talking over each other, and a lot of love, learn to resolve your problems in an effective manner because there won’t be any breaks after marriage.

Reena

%% POSTLINK%% is a post from: tHeMiNdBlOggEr

I was talking to my mentee the other day, and she was telling me about how she got to wear "drunk goggles" in her health class. The goggles simulate what it would feel like to be under the influence of alcohol. She said they made her feel really dizzy and she was seeing double. I asked her if she liked it, she said "No". Good.

Her teacher had a boy and girl come up to the front of the class to compete in a block building competition with the "drunk goggles" on. The girl won. They then competed again, minus the goggles. The girl lost. The class decided the girl was better off with goggles. She said the class got a kick out of wearing the goggles and everyone thought they were super cool. So much for preventive measures.

The goggles are made by a company called Fatal Vision

                               

 

The company provides the following description of the effects of the goggles:

"The Fatal Vision Black Label Goggles demonstrate the effects of binge or high-risk drinking. These goggles have an estimated BAC [blood alcohol concentration - ed.]of .25+. At this extreme impairment level the ability to drive has long been surpassed, and the dangers of blackouts and loss of consciousness are probable."

 

In California, it’s unlawful for any person who has 0.08 percent or more, by weight, of alcohol in his or her blood to drive a vehicle. So these goggles would simulate 4x’s that percentage.

It was interesting to hear about the goggles, and it makes me wonder if this will prevent kids from drinking, or peak their curiosity

 

Here’s an example of the effects of drunk goggles:

Reena

%% POSTLINK%% is a post from: tHeMiNdBlOggEr

I was reading Linda Goodman’s book of sun signs where I found this interesting chapter. It talked about the personality traits of a person based on the name.  It said that your name reveals interesting dimensions of your character, special traits, & qualities. It is not just a juxtaposition of alphabets in random order but a meaningful projection of your personality. The First & Last letter of your name defines you best.

A

Action Oriented , very business like, not a romantic Judge . People by appearance, Enjoy challenges , passionate , adventurous.

B

Sensual, Love Luxury, & being pampered, very private person. Thrives on new sensations and experiences. Good self control.

C

Love people,  like talking, very status conscious. Need to be  appreciated, very expensive, sexual, & sensual but controlled.

D

Very determined, Once you make up your mind to do something, nothing will deter you, very caring, highly sexual, passionate, intense, loyal, very jealous, & possessive.

E

Great talkers, enjoy arguments, feel invigorated by them. Hate discord of any kind, flirtations but just a tease, not very sexual.

F

Idealistic and Romantic, but very discerning, like to flirt, seldom reveal your true feelings. Sexual & passionate, but in private only. Outwardly showy, extravagant and gallant, indulge in fantasies.

G

Perfectionists, very fastidious, need intellectual stimulation, status means a lot. Sexual reserved. Very responsible & duty conscious.

H

Mercenary. Material wealth & possessions matter. You only give when you can get something in return, can be sexual & passionate, yet very aloof.

I

Love Life. Need to be loved, appreciated & adored. Enjoy the pleasures of the flesh. Love luxury, sexual but very serious. Easy bored, need stimulation all time.

J

Lots of stamina – physical energy. Enjoy challenges. Wanderers at heart, indulge in romantic fantasies, need thrills to escape the monotony of life. Idealistic being tied down bores you. 

K

Closed – in person, secretive, sensitive & shy seldom reveal your true nature. Very passionate & loving, but very serious & loyal.

L

Need intellectual stimulation. Very romantic. Love being denied & wined. Believe in good taste. Fastidious in a way. Refined. Few inhibitions.

M

Very emotional, intense fiery nature. Love & hate with the same intensity. Totally inhibited, lot of stamina.

N

Seem innocent, unsure & shy. Looks are deceptive. In reality, a shouldering fire. Very changeable. Easily bored. Very critical, repress emotions. 

O

Very versatile, but secretive and shy. Good at making money or gaining power. Manipulative, passionate, and sexual.  Need intensity and diversity. Very possessive.

P

Image and reputation matter.  So social proprieties of paramount importance. Appearance and intelligence very important to you. Fights stimulate you, social, sexual, and enjoy flirting. Need physical gratification.

Q

Very active, Need stimulation all the time, tremendous physical energy. Mix easily. Color, cast, and creed hold no bars. Enthusiastic, Need Romance. Good talkers.

R

No Nonsense, action oriented individuals. Fast and intelligent. Good looks are important. Need intellectual stimulation. Very sexy and very demanding too.

S

Business first – pleasure can take a back seat. Find it hard to relax. Careful and cautious. Romantic and idealistic. Very Sensual, but guarded. Very loyal.

T

Sensitive, private, and passive. Need someone to give you a lead. Atmosphere makes your mood. Great flirts, romantic, idealistic, and mushy at times. Enjoy being titillated and being stimulated but very changeable. Fickle. So everything is in mind and not in the heart.

U

Enthusiastic and idealistic. You like the challenge of romance but are a wonderer at heart. Need adventure, excitement and freedom. Sexy. Not dependable.

V

Very much your own person. Need freedom, excitement, and space. You want to get into people’s heads to see what makes them tick like danger, thrills, and suspense. You like to experiment.

W

Individuals with a big ego. Proud and determined, Will not concede defeat. Nothing will deter you from pursuing what you want. Romantic and idealistic. You only see what you want to see. You are also very intense in your relationships.

X

Need constant stimulation, get bored easily. Love to play around your mind is seldom at rest, always in fervent. You indulge in fantasies.

Y

Very independent, also very sensual and sexual. But you must get your own way, otherwise you’ll forego the whole thing. You like to control. Love making money. Need feedback all the time on how clever you are. Open, romantic, and stimulating. You are also a bit selfish.

Z

Very romantic and idealistic, but a bit of martyr. Love to play the sacrificing role. Sincere, passionate, lustful, and dreamy. You attract people with problems. See yourself as a savior. You have sexual fantasies but never reveal them to others.

%% POSTLINK%% is a post from: tHeMiNdBlOggEr

My First Party Bus Experience  Nothing short of AWESOME. Here’s how things went …

View Full Album

The night started off at a Japanese restaurant for a friend’s birthday. I had 7 sake bombs, felt a bit dizzy, and a bit out of my mind. I heard Raj(the birthday boy) talking to a friend.  “Yo, I m gonna call the party bus .. are you guys down for it?”  ….  The group’s response was unanimous, “Yeah I’m down for it!” .. “Fo sho man!” .. “Yeeeeeeaah!” … “Bring it on brotha!” . After good 2 minutes, when the groups excitement settled, Raj asked me “Are you down for it dude?” … My response was obvious, “Hell yeah man!”

View Full Album

It’s 9:30PM and I’m standing outside the Japanese restaurant after 7+3 sake bombs, 2 beers, and a dragon roll (sushi). We, a group of about 15, eagerly await Raj’s party bus.  I hear someone shout, “The pimp mobile has aaarriived!” I see a beautiful limo bus pull up slowly to the front of the restaurant.

I step into the bus – my mouth drops. The interior looks like a nightclub, with fiber optic lighting, plasma TV’s, stripper poles, limo style seating, and a fully stocked bar. The killer sound system is blaring, I feel like I’m in a Jay-Z video.

View Full Album

Everyone is buzzed from the sake bombs, but that didn’t stop the crew from taking more shots as the bus took off for our next destination, downtown San Jose. It took about 25 minutes to reach downtown, our first stop was Hanuman Thai Cuisine, a restaurant owned by a friend. People gawked as we stepped off the limo bus. The music was still blaring and everyone turned and looked at us. You’d think P-Diddy had just arrived considering the look on the face of the people on the street. I can relate to them though, I had the same reaction when I first saw the bus.

I felt like I was on top of the world, it was an awesome feeling. We went in to the restaurant, got a few rounds of shots, and got back on the bus. We made a few friends who also hopped on to the bus with us. Next stop, Sabor Lounge. As the bus approached Sabor, I saw a huge line, and felt a bit bumbed that we would have to wait. Then I heard Raj say, “All party bus folks get in the VIP line.” 2 minutes later we were in the club. Sweet!

We partied until 1am, walked out of the club, and the bus was waiting for us. The ride back was relaxing, we reminisced about the night as we made our way home.

Its been 3  months since that night, and I’ve been waiting for my next opportunity to get on a party bus. Thankfully,  New Years is right around the corner and there is an option of spending the night with friends on the Party Bus. I so wanna get on there and create new memories with old and new friends.

I checked the party bus site (Think Escape) and found awesome deal for NYE 2010.

NYE 2010 Party Bus Club Teaser Package

FREE VIP entry into Element Lounge and Club Atmosphere
FREE VIP entry at Element Lounge 9:00pm – 10:00pm
FREE VIP entry and PREMIUM OPEN BAR at Atmosphere 10:00pm – 2:00am (includes TOP SHELF liquor!)
Complimentary champagne toast to start the night off
Complimentary party favors
Complimentary New York style pizza from NY Pizza Kitchen – guaranteed to fill your belly!
• Chauffeured driven luxury charter bus
• Fun and professional hostess
• No lines
• AVOID DUI’s!
• NO minimum required!

For more details checkout: New Years Package Deal

Cmon ya’ll, let’s plan for a fun night with all the friends

Happy New Year

%% POSTLINK%% is a post from: tHeMiNdBlOggEr

Guilt got you feeling down?

Guilt is one of the 10 Negative Emotions that I mentioned in my earlier posts. Everyone feels it at one time or another, you shouldn’t fight it, but you can appreciate it.

Guilt stems from a person violating one of their personal standards, and acts as a reminder that you’ve done something that you don’t believe in. Typically, a person will deny their guilt, and convince themselves that the feeling doesn’t exist, or that they have no reason to feel such a way. Such an approach can create a negative cycle were you continue to commit the action that makes you feel guilty. The most common cause of GUILT is rudeness.

A few other reactions to guilt that you should watch out for are, feeling overwhelmed, fear, or surrendering to guilt.

Don’t get overwhelmed or feared and surrender to guilt, people will do that and will feel inferior for the rest of their lives. They feel so regretful about something they once did. The purpose of guilt is to clean up your act, to make  you not to do this again, to make things right when you screw up. I have friends who will keep feeling guilty of something they did, and because of that guilt feeling (to not face the awkwardness) they wouldn’t take the step to resolve the issue and feel more guilty. They entangle themselves into guilt every day. This becomes a vicious circle for them.

Use the following 3 approaches to effectively manage and overcome guilt.

1. Identify the emotion: In this case, we have identified the feeling as guilt.
2. Appreciate the emotion, and understand what it has to offer:  Guilt’s purpose is to help us live according to our standards. Many people feel guilty about something they did in the past, and because they feel shame, or embarrassment about what they did, they never take the appropriate steps to tackle the issue at its core. Their feeling of guilt begins to grow with time!
   Take one of my friends as an example. She hadn’t called her relatives in a while. She considered calling them, but because she felt guilty for not having made contact earlier, she continued to avoid the phone call. Now she’s at the point where she wants to avoid seeing them all together! All this because of a simple phone call. As you can see here, the feeling of guilt began dominating other parts of my friends life. We can’t change the past, but we can change how we react going forward.
3. Take action: Change our perception of the guilt and/or our procedure, and make sure we don’t violate our standards going forward.

Action, using 2 of the 3 set approach, is:

1. Should I feel guilt about this or not? If not, change your perception of the situation!
2. Did I say or do something that I don’t feel good about? If so, go back and clear up the situation. An apology always helps – the giver more than the receiver!

Happy Understanding

References:

Lessons In Mastery by Anthony Robbins

%% POSTLINK%% is a post from: tHeMiNdBlOggEr

Here are a few of my favorite pet names:

• Clarence
• Froggur
• Wilburt
• Annie
• Doggie
• Ness
• Nessafurd
• Puthynominus
• Floppy
• Ellis
• Skeeter
• Lami
• Whatamess
• Blue
• Squirrel
• Boofurd
• Animus (I really like this one)
• Chloee
• Dogus
• Popopotamus (Potamus)
• SB
• Hami
• Buttons
• Croutons

And of course…Herman
What are some of your favorite pet names?

%% POSTLINK%% is a post from: tHeMiNdBlOggEr

I went to Vegas this past weekend and was able to get into the hottest clubs for free! The last time I went to vegas I spent about $30 per club. Here are a few of my tips and tricks for making your way to the head of the line:

Hit the streets: There are guys, or gals, who work for clubs to distribute VIP passes on the streets for FREE! Some of them will ask for money, which they shouldn’t. However, I give the guys a tip for hooking me up with the tickets. The last guy that I found was parked in front of the overpass that goes from Treasure Island to the Venetian. He had passes to all the nightclubs, including, Tryst, XS, Tao, and much more!

Go directly to the club: I was able to get on the guest list for Tao by going directly to the club and having them put my name on the list. You can probably try calling the club as well.

Concierge Services: I had forgotten my XS passes at home so I went to the Wynn’s concierge and asked for nightclub passes. He hooked me up with 4 passes, no questions asked. You can probably do this at the other hotels as well.

Make use of your Hotel Key: Some clubs offer special privileges to hotel guests. The venetian had a special line for hotel guests so it was totally worth paying a little bit extra for a nice hotel room, and easy access to Tao. Make sure to keep your hotel key for future visits. Also, see if you can make friends with hotel guests at the club you’re going to

One other note, most of the passes get girls in for free, some passes offer ½ price admission for guys.

My favorite club, by far, was XS, in the Wynn. It’s very similar to Tryst, except a lot more spacious and I loved the pool area outside. If you need any other tips on what to do in Vegas be sure to hit me up!

%% POSTLINK%% is a post from: tHeMiNdBlOggEr

I recently came across an interesting blog by Derek Sivers, which talks about why you should NOT talk about your goals.

All this time I thought the opposite was true. According to Derek Sivers, “tests done since 1933 show that people who talk about their intentions are less likely to make them happen.

Announcing your plans to others satisfies your self-identity just enough that you’re less motivated to do the hard work needed. ”

This makes sense to me. And I’ve actually seen how announcing my goals have effected my own goals. Earlier in the year I talked about how I want to lose weight, and I’m going to the gym, eating healthy, etc. I made some progress, but not much. In the past few months, I just thought to myself, I want to get my shit together. And ever since then, I’ve been doing great (knock on wood ). I find when I don’t speak to people about my intentions, they seem to have more meaning to me and become more of an inner battle with myself. When I tell people of my goals, it gives me a “premature sense of completeness”.

NYU psychology professor Peter Gollwitzer has been studying this theory since his book came out in 1982. “Symbolic Self-Completion” – and recently published results of new tests in a research article, “When Intentions Go Public: Does Social Reality Widen the Intention-Behavior Gap?”

Newsweek analyzed the results of professor Peter Gollwitzer’s study:

“The study’s author thinks it has to do with sense of identity and wholeness. We all want to be an idealized person, and declaring our intentions to work hard is a symbolic act. It contributes to the goal of completing who we are.

That is, simply stating a strategy for [in the case of the study] becoming a good lawyer made the test subjects feel like they were real lawyers, and this inflated self-image paradoxically made them less hard working. They had become legends in their own minds, and legends don’t have to get down and dirty.”

Derek Sivers notes that “A related test found that success on one sub-goal (eating healthy meals) reduced efforts on other important sub-goals (going to the gym) for the same reason. You have “identity symbols” in your brain that make your self-image. Since both actions and talk create symbols in your brain, talking satisfies the brain enough that it “neglects the pursuit of further symbols.”

That doesn’t mean you can’t talk about your goals with your friends. What it does mean is, that you should discuss your goals and intents in a dissatisfied manner. Let’s say you want to start going to the gym. So instead of saying “I’m going to start going to the gym and lose all these extra pounds!”

You should say something more along the lines of “I really need to lose weight, make sure to keep me in check.”

Try it out and let me know how it goes.

%% POSTLINK%% is a post from: tHeMiNdBlOggEr