10 Negative Emotions
An emotion is a state of mind which involves feelings, thoughts, and behavior.
More on What is an Emotion?
“Every feeling you have good OR bad is not based on actual reality of life, but rather your interpretation as to what things mean. Remember, nothing in life has any meaning except the meaning you give it. So if you don’t like the way you feel about your life .. CHANGE the meaning!”
All in all, there are 10 negative master emotions as stated by Anthony Robbins
Uncomfortable: Bored, Rejected
Fear: Concern, Apprehension, Anxiety, Frightened, Terrified
Hurt
Anger: Resentment, Irritation, Furious, Enraged, Livid
Frustration
Disappointment
Guilt or Regret
Inadequate: Unworthy
Overloaded: Overwhelmed, Hopeless, Depressed, Helpless
Lonely
HOW TO MASTER THESE EMOTIONS
At any time, you feel any emotion, you can follow his 3 step approach to master your emotion
Identify the Emotion
Find out the category of the emotion out of the listed ten emotions or find out the closest match. You could feel many emotions at one time, find the core emotion.
Identify the Message and Appreciate the Emotion Offering the Message.
Every emotion has an underlying message attached to it. You have to recognize the message with it and then appreciate the emotion for serving us with a message. Don’t say that you don’t want to feel that emotion, rather appreciate it because if it wasn’t for the emotion you would not have learned to master this emotion. Message in simple terms is an emotion telling you “what to do next”.
Take Action
Take an action to overcome and control this emotion. Action could be change your perception or change your procedure. Change the perception which is making you feel a certain way OR Change your procedure to control this emotion.
For example, you shared something with someone in confidence. She breaks it off to one of her friend. Now you might feel angry or furious and you might feel hurt because she did not keep her word. Don’t fight these emotions, because these emotions have a message to give you. You are feeling mad at her because she according to you violated an important rule of yours and this is what is making you angry (this is the message). You are hurt because you feel a sense of loss and trust. You had an expectation which has not been met and this hurt your feelings(this is the message).
Now you can first change your perception. May be this person wasn’t trying to hurt you at all. She did not know that she has to keep it private. So stop thinking that she hurt your feelings intentionally. Next step is to change your procedure. Communicate your need. Tell her that this is confidential. If you are angry, tell her that it’s your rule (which is being violated) not necessarily their rule, but you need their support to go forward with this. Communicate that you have a standard.
Don’t fight the emotion, and don’t Ignore it. If you fight it or ignore it, it intensifies, and doesn’t go away till one day you start making changes.
I was really fascinated by a book called Lessons In Mastery by Anthony Robbins and so I thought of sharing the insights I got from it. Comments are most welcome!
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Cool post mind blogger. I remember reading something similar in a self help book that I picked up. It’s a great concept, and it’s amazing how easy it is to make a terrible situation, into something great, just by shifting our perception of whats happening. Love it!
thanks Priya!
i get disappointed a lot with my friends. I always be feeling like they just let me down. How do i deal with sumthing like this? I get depressed a lot because of it. thankz
@Lizza: I am not an expert on this but I can tell you from what I have learned. Depression comes when we try to do too much in a short period of time and if it doesn’t work out, we feel that there is no hope and we get depressed. Sit down , relax, and write the most important things for you to accomplish and your desires. Now take the first item (could be y my friends let me down) and do something about it (may be ask them wts the deal with this whole putting me down thing, communicate, raise your confidence level).
Once u knock off the first item on your list … u will feel that their is hope, u wont be overloaded, u will feel accomplished and good about yourself. (thereby killing your depression).
Also, don;t let their actions or talking control you
Thanks! That’s very helpful. I’m going to try it out this week. Ill let you know how it goes.